What a pregnant woman does not want to hear

What a pregnant woman does not want to hear!

What a pregnant woman really doesn’t want to hear!

Being pregnant. Nobody ever told you it would be so hard. That body. Those pregnancy illnesses. Being tired fulltime. And you've only just got your hormones under control. Just kidding, cause usually you can't control them at all. Well, this is what you don't want to hear as a pregnant woman! So watch out!

Her weight: a very sensitive subject!

‘Are you pregnant or...?’ Asked with a slight doubt in their voice. Uh, yeah, I'm pregnant. Why else would I be this fat? ‘I see. Your head got bigger’ Okay, well, thank you. No need to say that. ‘WOW, your belly is huge!’ I know, I know. I can feel it too. Leave me alone. ‘Are you sure it's only one baby?’ Ha-ha, that's funny. No, no twins in your belly, otherwise you would have been the first to know.

Don't point out the pregnancy hormones that are playing up again!

‘Are your hormones playing up again?’ *including evil laugh* No, I just don't like what you do. And how you do it. Why are you this annoying? Just get out of my sight. That makes it easier for me to deal with you. ‘Just because you're pregnant doesn't mean the world revolves around you.’ Uh, yeah, yes. Do you know how I feel? No! If I want to go home, I go home. If I want to do some shopping, I will shop. If I want to be cranky in bed, I will. Deal with it.

Foooooood!

‘Are you allowed to eat that?’ Thanks, but I know what I'm allowed and what I'm not allowed to eat. And no, I'm not "officially" allowed to eat this. But I'm eating it anyway. A little bite can't hurt! ‘Shouldn't you eat some more? You eat for two!’ No, I don't eat for two. That's nonsense. My baby is teeny-tiny. Besides, I can't eat more, it just doesn't fit! So stay out of it. ‘Fries, that's not good for your baby, is it?’ Seriously? Are you going to meddle in what I eat? When I feel like eating fries, I will eat fries. You should better leave those fries, too, you know... ‘Calm down, your food will be here in a minute’ I sincerely wish I could wait and be patient, but I can't! Please understand. When I'm hungry, I'm really hungry! I am not overreacting, I just have to eat NOW!

Mind your own business please

‘You better give birth at home. Or won't you?’ Uh, sorry? It's up to me where I give birth. That's none of your business! ‘You're gonna breast-feed, aren't you?’ Another case of mind your own business! I will do it my way! Besides, not everyone manages to breastfeed. So I don't know if I'm going to breastfeed. I sure hope so.. ‘I don't think of you as a 'motherly' type’ Is she saying this for real? Thanks for reminding me of my own insecurity. Really, thank you so much.

It's meant well, but... arrrrrgh!

‘Can I feel your belly?’ Ok, I must admit. I'm glad you asked first. But NO, I don't want you to touch me. Anyway, go ahead. ‘I hope your child gets a normal name!’ Now you're scaring me. It's not easy choosing the perfect baby name! ‘Try to enjoy it while it lasts. Soon the peace and quiet will be over’ Enjoy, how? I can barely move, everything hurts and I am exhausted. When I want to sleep, my stomach gets in the way. Or I have to pee. So resting before your baby arrives is rather tricky, isn't it? Oh, and I'm glad you're rubbing in that I won't be able to rest. ‘You were hoping for a girl, weren't you?’ A son or a daughter, I don't care. I would love both. And if I wanted a daughter, I really wouldn't tell you right now!

Waiting for your due date……

’Only 29 weeks? Still some time to go, right?’ Some more encouraging words, perhaps? That would be nice, thanks. ‘No baby yet?’ APPARENTLY NOT! You would have known otherwise. Another where-is-your-baby-question on Whatsapp? This is the best reply ever: http://www.haveyouhadthatbabyyet.com/

“A word of advice for when asking question to someone who is overdue. Ask whether "everything is still quiet" rather than pointing out that the baby is too late” - Sarah

‘Have you tried inducing labor?’ I'm not gonna tell you what I do or don't do. Don't you know that all of this has no effect? All you can do is wait and see. ‘Go for a walk. Then the baby will come!’ HOW?! I CAN BARELY WALK! ‘Have you been stripped yet? That really works’ No. No. No. Then I would be dilated. But there is nothing happening AT ALL. ‘He will come when he's ready. No baby's ever stayed inside’ Gee. Thanks for your help. That's helpful for sure... ‘But thank god you have a beautiful belly!’ What good is that going to do me? I'm +41 weeks pregnant and I want that baby out!!!

Not only words can be annoying…..

"Is she pregnant? Wow, look at that belly." You can hear them thinking it. Everyone looks at your belly, you're like a walking attraction. People, please don't stare at me like that! All that unwanted advice. It's meant to be sweet. I know, deep down. But sometimes you just can't take it anymore. They'll understand as soon as they're pregnant themselves... And the men, yeah. They'll never understand I guess? Is your partner pregnant? That can be tough! How to handle your pregnant wife's hormones. Do you want to experience a special moment of enjoyment during your pregnancy? With the Babywatcher you can admire your baby from your bed or couch. Just a small peek to see if everything is alright in there.

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